So I guess things are going to go back to how it was all along, the distant phone calls, the once in a while bbms, no more late night calls, no more communication, me feeling empty and upset and well you, studying. Going on with life. It has always been like that I remembered 2 years ago I told myself to be patient, to wait, wait for the day all this would be over. And then I thought 2011 is it, everything will end. But no, I guess you didn't do enough for this to be accomplished, it wasn't enough. Now, one more year of shit. Same shit, different year.
I really don't mind waiting and go through all this fucking shit again, after all I am numb but the things is I want to know if it's worth it. If I am going to wait for someone who's going to leave me anyway, then what is the point? You know, people change, you're human, you'll change too. So I am afraid. You ask me what have you done, and what I want. But if I told you what I wanted, will you be able to give me what I ask for? No. So, what is the point? There is no point.
For now, I'm just gonna live my life, shop, tumblr, tweet, blog, go to poly, make new friends, socialize, start new goals, study and do well for my year 1. I am very curious how this 2011 is going to be like.
Happiness is not an option, but rather a perspective. You can choose how you wanna look at things. I am tired of being upset and feeling upset whenever I wake up every damn fucking day - therefore, I am going to change my perspective of things I am going to change my mindset so that I can be a happier person. I used to be so happy, carefree - until you came along. It's like a white piece of paper, slowly stained with different dyes.
People say 2011 is a bad year, but why? Why classify something that hasnt proved itself yet? 2011, bad year? I will make it good. Live life! We won't be as young as we are today.
xxx
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